Thursday, September 25, 2008

What’s In A Name?

I couldn’t find an applicable Bible verse for this topic, but I am pretty sure someone can. If a verse comes to mind that goes with this post, please share it!

Ever since my after-school job as a day-care worker at Little People's Learning Center, kids have called me Miss Dianne. The children of my friends called me Miss Dianne, so I allowed my daughters the same informality of calling close adults by their first names with Miss or Mr. tacked onto the front.

That all changed when my brother-in-law brought up an interesting point. He said, “I think part of the reason why there are so many people charged with crimes committed by a ‘person in a position of trust’ is that we allow kids and adults to get too close. When kids call adults by their last names, the line between who is the child and who is the adult is less likely to become blurred.”

I think he is exactly right. The simple act of kids calling an adult by his or her last name clarifies that the two aren’t buddies. Roles are more clearly defined: teacher and student, coach and player, mentor and mentee.

When I called adults by their last names as a kid, I thought it was a sign of respect. I didn’t feel disrespected when my friends’ kids called me Miss Dianne, but I failed to see that there is more to the issue than respect alone. There is something valuable to our culture when there are clear definitions, or boundaries, in interactions between the generations.

What do your kids call adults? What contributed to that decision for your family? Share your ideas on the subject.

1 comment:

Robbie Iobst said...

You've really encourage me with this post, Dianne. I passively allow Noah to call adults whatever the adult says. Usually it's their first name. I have always had the inkling that he should call adults by Mr or Mrs or Ms and their last name. But once again, passive parenting ruled. No more. You have led the way on this for me. THANK YOU!