Last time we talked about giving kids choices. Sometimes we can get
overwhelmed by the volume of choices we make in a day and it can be hard to
decide which to hand over to our kids, which to make ourselves, and when to
hold firm to our decisions when our kids want something different. We call this “picking
our battles” because it just isn’t practical, fun, or relationship-building to
argue over everything.
If we question everything our
children do we will be in constant conflict. We want our kids to develop the
ability to think, to assess situations, and to make appropriate decisions based
on those assessments. This takes lots and lots of practice, trial and error,
and the experience of making mistakes and learning from them. Let your children
fail so they can learn from those encounters. It is one of the hardest things
for parents to do, and it is one of the most educational for kids.
Take a few minutes to think about your values and your vision for your
family. What is truly important to you? When your children are grown and they
leave your home, what character traits do you want firmly planted in them? These
will help you pick your battles. If your child makes a decision that conflicts
with one of your core values, you will definitely want to address it. If he
makes a choice that you don’t care for but it doesn’t impact his values, you
can often let his choice stand.
Smarter
parents give their children the opportunity to make smart choices, then pick
their battles, focusing on the issues related to their values.
Do
you feel like you can evaluate situations well in order to pick your battles
wisely?
Learn
more about picking your battles in a Smarter Parenting teleclass. Go to www.MotheringLikeTheFather.com
today to get details and register.
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