Take Active Steps to Manage Stress Part 4 – Use Tools to Manage Your Day

No one makes great choices when stressed. It is especially hard to be patient and stay consistent with our kids when we feel under pressure. While we are all likely to blow our tops occasionally, there are five steps we can take to manage our stress so we are in a better emotional place to handle the situations that trigger our unwanted reactions.

Strategy 4 is to use tools to manage our days more effectively.

When my mind is on one hundred things at a time, I can’t focus on anything.  I spend my time working on a little bit of everything, leaving a day’s work that reveals no visible results.  I end up tired and frustrated because despite all my hard work I have nothing to show for it. 

I realize it sound tedious if you are not a list maker, but keeping a “to do” list really does help.  When I know that phone call I need to make is on my list I can finish the task at hand without worrying I’ll forget about it.  When laundry is on the list I know I will get to it and I don’t have to start a load just because I’m reminded it needs to be done.  The list is my memory and all I need to remember is to write things down and finish what I’ve started before moving on to the next item. This allows me to actually be productive and to see some real results rather than just working all day without accomplishing anything.

For some people it works to write down everything needing to be done, for others it helps to write a shorter, modified list that includes only the top five things you need to do.  Or maybe you just list the little projects that keep slipping through the cracks.  Experiment and use the type of list that makes you feel in control of your day. The sort of list you use may change with time, but if your list is stressing you out then it is the wrong type.

Another list I find helpful relates to my least favorite question of the day, “What’s for dinner?”  You can answer this by planning your meals in advance. Whether you go to one of those places where you assemble a bunch of dishes to put in your freezer, cook in advance at home to fill your freezer, use a meal planning website such as relishrelish.com, or simply work out a list of meals to make for the week, you will find that knowing what you will make in advance is a big stress reliever.

Knowing what you are going to cook also helps you make a grocery list. Never take your children to the grocery store unless you have your list with you. Know what you need, and grab it. Do not take the time to read labels or compare prices when shopping with your kids. Get what you know works and move on. Find a time when the kids are with dad or at school to do your real shopping.

To learn about more tools to help you feel in control of your time and your day, register for the Smarter Parenting Teleclass at www.MotheringLikeTheFather.com.

Take active steps to manage stress – Find Some Quiet

No one makes great choices when stressed. It is especially hard to be patient and stay consistent with our kids when we feel under pressure. While we are all likely to blow our tops occasionally, there are five steps we can take to manage our stress so we are in a better emotional place to handle the situations that trigger our unwanted reactions.

Last time we talked about making time for God.

The second strategy for managing stress is to find some quiet time to do your “adult thinking.” 

All adults have things they need to mentally process and work they need to accomplish without interruption. It could be work for a job, it could be a hobby you are passionate about, it could be balancing the checkbook or making a family budget for the month, it doesn’t matter. We all have things we can’t do when the kids are around talking to us and needing us to take care of things. 

But when we don’t get this work done, it starts to irritate us. It almost begins to take on weight as we mentally mull it over and worry about when it will get done. And when our brains are busy worrying about this work, we get stressed and we don’t think clearly about the tones of voice we use, our word choices, or our attitudes. When I have something that requires uninterrupted thought, I have found that the only time I can do it is when the rest of my family is asleep.  For me that is first thing in the morning before everyone is awake, for you that might be after everyone else has gone to bed for the night.

Do not waste this time doing work you can do with the kids. This is not the time to clean the house or update your facebook status. Use this time wisely so you can clear your head and keep your stress level under control.

Learn how to make the most of this time, how it can benefit your family, and what to do when your kids interrupt it with the Smarter Parenting Teleclass. Get more information at www.MotheringLikeTheFather.com and click on Parent Coaching.